A forewarning: I may offend you in the words to follow.
There, now you can’t say I didn’t tell you.
I’m going to talk about something that I feel a lot of people have made preconceived notions about. I’m going to do my best to approach this topic with as much love, patience, grace and faith as I expect from you.
When I was in high school, I was in a little rock band that did some fun things in music for our age. I did crazy things to my hair and dressed the part. Senior year rolled around and I got voted class musician. There were plenty of actual musicians in my class that were more knowledgeable, better practiced, and more professional, I just happened to be a “rocker.” I remember seeing the ballot with my name and two other guys who had been in orchestra since they were kids.
About a month after the “election,” I ran into the parents of one of the guys who didn’t win the title of class musician. They knew who I was, and I knew who they were. We were cordial, offering half cracked smiles and greetings accustomed to less than familiar people. The air was a little tense, but I was naive to why they may have had any hard feelings towards me. Almost immediately after saying “good to see you,” I saw their faces turn sour, like a bad memory coming to life again. I overheard under their breath, “he didn’t deserve it, our son should have won.”
Almost immediately, memories of rocket football, choir concerts, creative writing classes, and music classes I shared with this young man came pouring through my mind. One after another, I recalled over and over how his self-esteem was less than his beautiful tenor voice boomed in operatic style. He always seemed pushed by an unspoken force to have the right answers and always seemed uneasy when it came to things deemed “manly.” He played football because his dad made him.
I would later learn that the young man was gay.
Is it nature verses nurture? Is the upbringing of a man or woman by overbearing and overly assertive parents indicative of sexual orientation? Is there a “gay gene?” Do they deserve to be treated differently?
I’m asking these questions, because so often I hear about gays not being accepted in the church. Seems to me that homosexuality is like any other sin. If God weighs each sin with the same scale and each accounting for the same weight, then how are we to treat the sin as though it deserves more judgement? Does the church not bring in alcoholics and host AA meetings? Is the community of believers not called to love the unloved, to care for the broken and heal hearts through the grace we have been given?
I have a few gay friends, and they know I’m a Christian. I have heard on more than one occasion that their problem with Christianity isn’t the belief that there is God, but with the actual community of Christ followers and the hypocrisy accompanied by it. They have told me that the one group of people who are supposed to love them WITHOUT CONDITION, are the ones who deny them over and over. Almost all of them raised in a church, but as soon as the church learned of their new direction in life, they were no longer welcome.
That frustrates me.
That really frustrates me.
I don’t know where you stand in your views on homosexuality. I’m asking you to have an open mind about questioning the beliefs you may or may not have been raised with regarding the issue. I’m asking you to see this group of people through the eyes of Christ. I’m asking you for one second to see them as real people who are just as broken, messed up and in need of encouragement, grace, and love as I am. I’m not asking you to adopt the lifestyle or physically do anything.
I’m asking for a change in your heart.
His word tells me that the overflow of my heart is what comes out of my mouth. When our hearts are filled with love for every child of God, the words that seep into this world are filled with that same love. I think in order for this expansive group of people to truly feel loved, to grow any kind of relationship with Christ and to put any trust back into the community of believers, there needs to be a drastic change in our hearts.
Again, I’m not asking you to join an activist group or march in a parade, I’m asking you to look at your heart and allow God’s hands to work and soften this specific callous. If I have offended you, I apologize, but to be honest, I’m pretty sick and tired of hearing that another person has been rejected from the church. If you are reading this, consider the following: God cannot physically come down in a real, tangible form to love these people. He is embedded in each of us to work through and in us. I’m asking you and I’m telling you to put down your guard and petty judgements and allow God to love those around you, through you. Be the catalyst He calls us to be.
What if sexual orientation is solely dependent on nurture?
With love,
J
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November 4th, 2009 at 11:56 pm
There are so many opinions about this issue. But opinions and feelings aside, as Christians, we must look to the scriptures to decide what is Truth (no matter what our personal opinion is about it).
The following was taken from http://www.bibleinfo.com
What does the Bible teach about practicing homosexuality? It’s in the Bible, Romans 1:26-27, NIV. “Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.”
Is practicing homosexuality a sin? It’s in the Bible, Leviticus 18:22, TLB. “Homosexuality is absolutely forbidden, for it is an enormous sin.”
Can a practicing homosexual go to heaven? It’s in the Bible, I Corinthians 6:9, TLB. “Don’t you know that those doing such things have no share in the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who live immoral lives, who are idol worshippers, adulterers or homosexuals—will have no share in his kingdom.”
Like all sinners, practicing homosexuals are called to repent. It’s in the Bible, I Timothy 1:10-11, TLB. “Yes, these laws are made to identify as sinners all who are immoral and impure: homosexuals, kidnappers, liars, and all others who do things that contradict the glorious Good News of our blessed God, whose messenger I am.”
Sinful patterns of all kinds must stop, and need God’s forgiveness. It’s in the Bible, I Corinthians 6:11, NIV. “And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.”
There is hope for the practicing homosexual. It’s in the Bible, I Corinthians 10:13, TLB. “But remember this—the wrong desires that come into your life aren’t anything new and different. Many others have faced exactly the same problems before you. And no temptation is irresistible. You can trust God to keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can’t stand up against it, for He has promised this and will do what He says. He will show you how to escape temptation’s power so that you can bear up patiently against it.”
If you are a practicing homosexual, what should you do?
First acknowledge your sin. It’s in the Bible, Psalm 51:2-4, TLB. “Oh, wash me, cleanse me from this guilt. Let me be pure again. For I admit my shameful deed—it haunts me day and night.”
Second, Ask forgiveness for your sin—God says you can start over again. It’s in the Bible, Psalm 51:7-12, TLB. “Sprinkle me with the cleansing blood and I shall be clean again. Wash me and I shall be whiter than snow. And after You have punished me, give me back my joy again. Don’t keep looking at my sins—erase them from Your sight. Create in me a new, clean heart, O God, filled with clean thoughts and right desires. Don’t toss me aside, banished forever from Your presence. Don’t take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me again the joy of Your salvation, and make me willing to obey You.”
Third, Believe that God has indeed forgiven you and quit feeling guilty. It’s in the Bible, Psalm 32:1-6, TLB. “What happiness for those whose guilt has been forgiven! What joys when sins are covered over! What relief for those who have confessed their sins and God has cleared their record. There was a time when I wouldn’t admit what a sinner I was. But my dishonesty made me miserable and filled my days with frustration. All day and all night Your hand was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water on a sunny day until I finally admitted all my sins to You and stopped trying to hide them. I said to myself, ‘I will confess them to the Lord.’ And You forgave me! All my guilt is gone. Now I say that each believer should confess his sins to God when he is aware of them, while there is time to be forgiven. Judgment will not touch him if he does. You are my hiding place from every storm of life; You even keep me from getting into trouble! You surround me with songs of victory.
November 5th, 2009 at 12:56 am
I will simply say this. Quoting scripture from Corinthians is NOT the guided response we should have for this issue. While fundamentally we should dissemninate all scripture the clear etablishment of the New Covenant and Jesus intervention for ALL our sins is what is paramount to this and all sin. Therefore because The New Covenant has been establshed, We ask Jesus to come into our Hearts and Dwell in us and Forgive us from our sins. Because of His death we shall live despite all of our iniquities. He shall forgive us and not forsake us. Does this mean once saved a Man will never sin again? Absolutely not. Does this mean there will not be struggles? Absolutely not.
The cornerstone for confrontation of any sin is coming into a relationship with Jesus Christ, Accepting our sin Nature and realizing
Jesus is the only way and answer to overcome.
John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that WHOEVER believes in him shall not perish but have ETERNAL life.”
November 5th, 2009 at 3:12 am
offend away my friend. If not this, there is always something else that will offend “us”. I like what Jesus said, “let him who is without sin cast the first stone.” I don’t pack around rocks… I have enough weight to drag me down, if I loose sight of the Savior, that I don’t dare go close to deep water like this. jr? right on.
November 5th, 2009 at 4:07 am
It is so refreshing to hear ‘hot’ topics like this approached with sensitivity and honesty. I think in the book ‘God’s Politics’ it said that homosexuality is only mentioned 9 times and none of them by Jesus, yet the Bible has 1,000s of comments about how to treat the poor and oppressed.
We cannot deny what the Bible says, but lets get it all in perspective.
November 5th, 2009 at 4:45 am
Jason. Is your clock off? notice the dates above. my time is 3:09 pm Wed.
December 6th, 2009 at 4:52 pm
ok… what fellowship does a believer have with an unbeleiver?? I see you call homosexuals your friends? But a Friend is one who will tell you the truth in Love, not sit there and condone your actions knowing that you are on the way to hell. What kind of a friend is that?
How can 2 walk together unless they be agreed? Are you in agreement with sin? sin is sin and as I recall in the book of Acts, Yes we are saved by grace but one thing paul said to keep away from was sexual immorality. Homosexuality is clearly sexual immorality. To Love the sinner is to expose the very thing that has them bound but to do it in Love by the spirit of God. It’s not to partnership with them and act like nothing is wrong because no one is promised tomorrow. You as a believer should be influencing the unbeliever, not the other way around. Love them out of thier sin. This walk for Christ takes work and not everybody is willing to change but narrow is the way… wide is the path that leads to destruction and if we as believers dont stand up and fight against the enemy then the way to destruction will continue to become wider and wider.
December 20th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
Some of my favorite people in this world are gay. And they are the kindest, most generous people you will ever meet. I don’t agree with their lifestyle. In fact, I know it’s wrong according to the Bible.
But the Bible also says that one sin isn’t any greater than the other. So the adultery I committed during my first marriage (and thankfully, gratefully have been forgiven of) is just as much a sin as someone who is gay. Saying the Lord’s name in vain is just as much of a sin as murder. And here’s the awesome news, none of it is too much or too horrible for God to forgive. We all sin, each and every one of us.
Part of being Christians is to love EVERYONE unconditionally. Even those that choose a sinful lifestyle. What God wants us to do is live a life in Him that is so different that is shows no matter what we do or where we are. So that those that don’t know Christ will see that we’re different and want what we have. The point of being Christians is to bring others to know Him. How can we do that if we’re judgemental or refuse to accept someone because of how they live?
It is possible to love someone and support them, but not support or even like their actions. God loves them because He created them and they are His children, God loved them enough (just as he loved us enough) to send His only son to die for them. Christ loved them enough to be crucified for them. So doesn’t that mean we should love them too?