You have likely heard or seen the “divorce statistic” for Christians. It appears that Christians divorce at about the same rate (or possibly higher) than non-Christians. According to Barna research, 11% of the adult population is currently divorced; 25% of adults have had at least one divorce during their lifetime, and divorce rates among conservative Christians were significantly higher (i.e. Baptists 29%, non-denominational 34%) than for other faith groups, and those that identify “no faith” experience.
There have been many that have attempted to explain away this seemingly inconstant factoid for people of faith. They attempt to create a higher sub-culture within Christianity that includes true “Christians” by defining only those born-again Christian couples who marry other born-again Christians, have a church wedding after receiving premarital counseling, and faithfully attend church weekly and pray daily together.
While I have no doubt that Church attendance and Bible Study and pre-marriage conferences all improve the success rate for marriages, I have another suggestion: forgiveness.
When Jesus was asked to clarify His teaching on divorce (Mark 10:2-12), Jesus recounted that it was God’s intention that marriage would last forever. He said that Moses provided concessions that included divorce to suit the hardness of man’s heart.
Some Christians, including pastors, cling to an “exception” in Matthew 19:9, where Jesus speaks about “adultery”. However, this is not an exception to the “forever” of marriage but the ability of the faithful and remaining spouse to be free to remarry. Paul supports this freedom in his teaching as well. Again, I believe that Paul’s teaching is on remarriage, not a justification for divorce.
The teaching on forgiveness in the New Testament is very clear. Jesus said we are to forgive 70 times 7; God forgives us so we need to forgive each other. Christianity and the teachings of Jesus are unique in its offer of complete forgiveness. In the plan of salvation, forgiveness is central in the provision in which God completely forgives the sins of everyone who comes to faith and belief in Christ.
All too often Christians are quick to provide a quick remedy to an injured spouse when adultery is involved. And that remedy is divorce.
Forgiveness is always an option. “Let not man separate what God has joined together” (Mark 10:9)
Ken Behr
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70X7, Divorce, Forgiveness, Ken Behr
This post was written by:
Ken Behr - who has written 5 posts on Transparent Christian Magazine.
Ken Behr is Campus Pastor of LifeChurch.tv in Hendersonville, TN. He has held a number of senior management positions in companies and organizations, both for-profit and nonprofit/ministry.
He has been a guest on numerous news broadcasts including Fox News, CNN, CBN Newswatch as well as the local affiliates for ABC, CBS and Fox. He has been on panel discussions on NPR Radio and is a frequent guest on Christian radio. His articles recently have been published in Ministry Today, Church Executive, and CMA Magazine. (And now, Transparent Christian Magazine)!
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You have likely heard or seen the “divorce statistic” for Christians. It appears that Christians divorce at about the same rate (or possibly higher) than non-Christians. According to Barna research, 11% of the adult population is currently divorced; 25% of adults have had at least one divorce during their lifetime, and divorce rates among conservative Christians were significantly higher (i.e. Baptists 29%, non-denominational 34%) than for other faith groups, and those that identify “no faith” experience.
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July 20th, 2009 at 4:54 am
I have questions about this quotes which seen clearly stated. Divorce does not end the sin of adultery. It extends the sin to both the woman an the man not just the offending party.
Please offer some commemtary on htese verses which cannot be easily dismissed due to their repetition. Thank you.
Luke 16:18
“For example, a man who divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery. And anyone who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:32
But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who marries a divorced woman also commits adultery.
Jeremiah 3:8
She saw that I divorced faithless Israel because of her adultery. But that treacherous sister Judah had no fear, and now she, too, has left me and given herself to prostitution.
Mark 10:11
He told them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery against her.
Mark 10:12
And if a woman divorces her husband and marries someone else, she commits adultery.”
verses are New Living Translation pasted form You Version
November 10th, 2009 at 1:46 am
Hi. I read a few of your other posts and wanted to know if you would be interested in exchanging links?
July 10th, 2010 at 7:03 pm
As a Newbie, I am always searching online for relationship articles that can help me. Thank you
October 7th, 2010 at 9:19 pm
Divorce is usually the end of a good relationship, every couple should avoid it:-;
October 23rd, 2010 at 12:54 am
there is nothing good getting a divorce, this is perhaps the saddest moment of your life’-*
December 12th, 2010 at 5:58 pm
divorce is of course one of the worst thing that you could experience but you could get over it `~,