Transparent Christian Magazine

This morning when I woke up I could hear the wind blowing leaves off the tree outside my house. They made a loud clattering sound when they hit the concrete porch and then scraping noises like someone scouring a dirty skillet.

“Man, I could listen to that all day” I said to no one.

So I did listen with my eyes closed for a long time. When I opened them I was startled because my roommate’s cat was sitting on my nightstand, not two feet from my face. She was looking directly at me.

I said, ‘Hello.’

The cat swished its tail but did not turn its eyes from me or blink even. I thought ‘strange that my first act of the day is this. Getting into a staring contest with a cat.’ But I got into it and stared right back and didn’t stop until my eyes started watering. I tried to keep them open but finally my will faltered and I blinked. The whole time the cat did not stop looking at me.

My mood changed entirely. I had been defeated by an animal and I hadn’t even gotten out of bed yet. The leaf noises outside sounded irritating.

“Boo!” is what I said next loudly. It completely startled the cat, who drew back her head and squinted her eyes and jumped down off the table and ran out of the room. I had won, but it was a cheap victory.

I stayed under the covers for a good while after that. In the wake of the cat thing, getting out of bed seemed like a huge, swollen, near-impossible task. The confederate army lost the battle of Nashville just around the corner from my house, who was I? Leaves attacked the porch and did not quit.

I felt I was falling and no one could see me. I was tumbling deeper into my covers. I was becoming paralyzed. I tried to speak but couldn’t. Everything outside was loud, the angry sound of a wind army.

‘I am ridiculous’ I said eventually. But even this rally wasn’t enough. Something was lost.

Finally there was a knocking sound at my door. I guess I had fallen asleep. The knocking kept knocking. Was it at the door? Yes, it was. I had been called to service.

I willed myself out of bed and put on the black sweatpants I had laid out the night before and went into the next room. I walked up to the door and opened it. There was a little boy I recognized as my neighbor. He was probably 4 years old, with a clear bright face and straight blondish hair.

He said “Korby!”

“Hello Peanut.” Is what I said. I have taken to calling him peanut for some reason.

He said, “I found you something!”

“What is it?”

“Guess”

So I said, “A dead snake?”

I meant it to be funny, but I could see it wasn’t. His face made a perfect impression of an offended child.

I scrambled. I am a dark place in the sky I thought to myself.

“Kidding!” I said. “I know you would only bring me something utterly splendid.” I could use a phrase like ‘utterly splendid’ with Peanut. We had an understanding.

Then I noticed he had his hands cupped in front of him. Clearly the gift was there. He leaned forward slightly and looked up at me. His eyes said “This is the moment!”

I squatted down so we could be together on this one. He opened his hands. A butterfly. A monarch, alive and adjusting its orange and speckled wings like an athlete.

“A butterfly!” he said for all the world.

At that moment the little thing took off. Fluttering all crazy and unpredictable and ah, beautiful. My heart hurt.

We watched from the porch as it battled the wind and leaves and suddenly it hit a draft or something and soared around the corner of the house and out of sight.

“Ta- -da!” is what he said next.

I wanted to say thank you but I knew it wouldn’t be enough so I went inside and got a reeses peanut butter cup that was leftover from halloween and I came back and handed it to him.

“That was awesome,” I said. He smiled and ran around the corner of the house in the direction of the monarch.

Korby Lenker

Read more of Korby’s writing here, and if you want to give your ears some love, pick up a copy of Korby’s new cd, “Lovers & Fools” here.